Monday, December 18, 2017
Me: Good morning.
Charlie: Good morning love of my life.
Me: I’m trying to get up earlier so we can talk first thing in the morning.
Charlie: I know. What are we talking about this morning?
Me: I’m not sure. You have any ideas? Is there anything you think would be helpful for me to know?
Charlie: The main thing I would like to constantly impress upon you is do not worry. You worry too much. No matter what happens or how things turn out, you don’t need to worry
Me: I know. At least I know in my head. I can come up with every kind of scenario to worry about. But isn’t some worry necessary? Doesn’t it motivate people to do things? Get things done?
Charlie: The best way to get things done is by imagination and inspiration to move toward something, not by worry and fear that if you don’t do something then something bad might happen.
Me: Yeah, I guess that makes sense. So what should I be imagining and getting inspired about?
Charlie: We don’t need to fill in all the details but wouldn’t it be nice if all we had to do is stay connected every day and chat for a couple of pages every day, and then everything else would be magically resolved?
Me: I like the sound of that. You mean my financial problems would be resolved? My aches and pains would all be resolved? My bouts of loneliness would be resolved? My health would improve?
Charlie: Yes, all that. And then you could fly.
Charlie: Just kidding. I mean yes! Why not? But maybe not with wings. Lol! Just airplane wings. Let’s not push our luck. Silly me. Sure, fly anywhere, travel. It would be nice for you to get out and travel a bit more. I know you’re feeling like you’ve been in the mountains too long. But now you’re almost afraid to leave sometimes.
Me: I know. Even though I have this lovely house in this vast wilderness, my life feels pretty small.
Charlie: We designed it this way didn’t we? We wanted absolute freedom; no one demanding, needing, or even wanting anything from us. After two marriages and raising three biological kids and lots of other kids, we just wanted to incubate didn’t we? There is no one here to even influence us anymore. You can leave a pencil on the table and come back a week later and it’s still there. It hasn’t moved, no one took it! LOL! That’s a big change from the way things used to be is in it? Remember? With all the kids and their friends all over the place? Things were moving around constantly. School mornings were the best. Five minutes before the bus we were still looking for lost socks and homework.
Me: The best? Actually that was pretty nerve-racking Charlie. You know that especially when I had to get myself ready for work at the same time. Why do you say it was the best?
Charlie: Just because it was all so dynamic, fast-paced, loud, crazy. And remember how fun it was?
Me: Oh yes! We all laughed a lot. My kids knew how to split my gut with laughter.
Charlie: But these are the best days now. We’re living exactly the way we always wanted to, with no one to be accountable for and no one to be accountable to accept our self.